Do you find yourself wandering between pink fantasy and the maximum severity of the melancholy realism?
You feel alienated among the nearest people? Strange and others can not understand you?
Find intelligent, energetic, ambitious and friendly and also have plenty of idiocy, frustration and nervousness of hatred!
If yes answer
Then, the probability closer than you are mentally ill. More precisely one of those has bipolar disorder disease.
And who wrote these words, one of them.
I am a person. 25 year-old. Civil engineering student and barely graduating. I am in final year of University.
One day while browsing the Internet, read an article of an intellectual talk of God, religion and existential question. I went to the comments on article, among those taken on the personal lives of the intellectual and gave an explanation to this question; why he committed suicide? Where the thinker called Ismail Abdulla had committed suicide plunges himself into the River!
Said I think his suicide because depression is one of the reverse changes related to bipolar disease and references to its story of a friend who suffered from a manic-depressive disease and committed suicide by taking a dose of sedatives.
I keep silent a moment, realized the answer on the deep confusion inside of me. This idea haunts me for years. Why always thinking about suicide? Why several times to find suicide as the sanctuary and the best choice for me? Without reason or really problem I lost all desire to live? Why spent more of my thought looking for a method of suicide?
Accidentally I've known the answer now as a comfort I felt that I got a response on the issue of confusion, but it's a disappointment, I'm sick mental!
I went to Google and the search for disease, results started showing, many pages to talk about the disease, causes, symptoms and treatments. People write their complaint, some of them know that they have a disorder bipolar disease and others do not know. Woman speaks his life disturbed with the husband who accuse him that she aborted their fetus. Another suffered wonders of women; My husband accused me of spying for the Agency's intelligence on him! A person who writes about his friend went himself down at sea in his car
Disorder I one of them with bipolar illness? Yes!
Her treatments are happened to me? By reading the the bipolar disorder treatments, Yes
I'd read lots of articles related to the disease and do not forget that I have bipolar disorder and founded the symptoms as mania or depression have been passed.
Long time I triad forget that I have the disease of bipolar disorder, I do not know why! May be thought that forget will make me do not feel the symptoms of bipolar disorder! It is the stupid belief, I lived with a gain of bipolar disorder symptoms and yet, I can't fool myself, but I have never said that one on my illness.
Now, I decided to write about my self. My journey, my life of dramatic changes, the ups and downs is a novel
With blogging, I will make each item as a short story, think I have the ability to write literature, after ending my stories combine everything in the novel, because I see my life contains many unexpected and dramatic events on an intellectual, human and social level my study, relationship to religion, family and love alone. All this have been rotating and will produce special novel.
I'm Fiodor Dostoyevsky
If I have prevented my discussions of language to round people, but allow my statement of PIN, I'll leave a free space on suffering
It will be beautiful get other who have the disease of bipolar disorder and my results to treat the disease. I hope help all and share with them our experiences and lives, we know that communication between the mental pain is an important method of treatment, particularly individuals have bipolar disorder disease because they feel strangeness and introversion, where others can not understand us.
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